what is depression to me?

it’s like explaining how human anatomy functions to a 1-year-old kid. gosh its too hard with millions of words and feelings I have stored inside of me.

for me, depression is like, hey what the fuck DO I EVAN HAVE A DEPRESSION OR NOT???

for me, it’s like wanting to eat the whole day without even caring about it would destroy my heart one day,

it’s like don’t want to sleep and want to do some work but instead of that sleeping all day,

it is like want people to know that I’m suffering and I want their love and support but not being able to tell them,

it’s like want to have people’s hug but too scared cause they’ll think you want just attention,

it’s like want to move on from one thing and be happy but cant cause you have tried and you’ll eventually be there again after a while,

It’s like wanting to tell people how much you love them but can’t cause they don’t listen to you,

it’s like you don’t want to hurt anyone, and you know that hurting yourself would make them unhappy but still, you would do that cause you’re hurt and you just want to end the suffer and all that shit going on in your head,

it’s like wanting to express your feelings about how you feel about them but can’t cause you have no fucking IDEA what the fuck is wrong with you,

it’s like finding a purpose in your life but you can’t cause you’re just lost in your life so its damm hard to even find yourself,

it’s like finding out what to say to people when they give an example of how other people are suffering in this world and you are lucky so stop being an ass,

it’s like finding out what to say to the people when they say oh everything is going to fine, you are just going through a phase and you will be happy again,

it’s like feeling crushed when people say that you are selfish and weak to kill yourself and don’t you care about us?

It feels like living in hell cause you are living in a society where you are always judged based on your moves and thoughts, who you love and being yourself,

it’s like finding a rose garden in a burning hell,

it feels like seeing your only support going away from you and hurting but you can’t do anything,

It’s like all you do it’s never enough,

it’s like all these shit i have just written doesn’t matter to anyone………………….

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